pause button

I may stop blogging for a while. So many stories, so many things to say, but I get the feeling that I’m the only one watching this channel. There’s nothing wrong, no sudden trigger, I’m just questioning why I continue after 14 years. I still write for myself, but perhaps I post it for vanity’s sake. If I throw words out there and no one notices, what’s the point? Unless my fingers are broken, I can still write things and simply save them on my computer.

Anyway, consider this a long pause, not necessarily a good bye. I’ll post if I have something really important to say. Otherwise, I think the internets will be okay without me for a while.

Having said the above, I know there are a few actual live humans who follow me, because we have interacted on each other’s blogs. I would very much appreciate it if you want to keep in contact. If you e-mail me at, hopefully we can remain blog-friends.

For now, so long, and thanks for all the fish.

hello, morning

So I couldn’t sleep well last night, so I decided to get up around 3:30 am and read blogs to put myself to sleep. What I actually did is read my own blog posts from 6 to 7 years ago, saving some stuff for future posts.

Reading old posts is sometimes painful, sometimes scary, but also a little bit heartening to know I am not in the same dark places that I was at that time. I know I am susceptible to returning to those dark days, and things can change in a hurry with bipolar, but for now I am glad things are better.

Now here I am, almost four hours later, and the eastern sky is beginning to lighten. I have today off, so at least I won’t be overly tired at work.

Oh, the possibilities for today. I can cook french toast, watch a movie, play games with the fam, get my hair cut, or watch snowflakes falling. More likely, I’ll just take a long nap.

refresh button

Sometimes you have to clean house, which is true with blogs as well. This site became bloated and stale, with almost 500 posts of sometimes meaningless drivel. There were also some things written which I don’t want to be public information anymore. Finally, I lost interest in writing, and people lost interest in reading.

I decided to start over with this site rather than delete it and find a new title. Lazy, I suppose, but I still like the symbolism of the daily struggle for me to survive. I have kept the old posts, just hidden them, and when I find something I like I will repost it for your entertainment or disgust.

As usual, this site will be about me, but there will be much less about other people. This will be a place to share things I don’t want to post under my real name. There will be some bipolar discussion, but probably more about photos, life, and people I used to love.